A Scottish Jew decided to retire and take up golf, so he applied for membership at a local golf club.
About a week later he received a letter that his application has been rejected.
He went to the club to inquire as to why.
Secretary: "You are aware that this is a Scottish golf club?"
Scot: "Aye, but I am as Scottish as you are, ma'am, my name is MacTavish"
.
Secretary: "Do you know that on formal occasions we wear a kilt?"
Scot: "Aye, I do know, and I wear a kilt too."
Secretary: "You are also aware, that we wear nothing under the kilt?"
Scot: "Aye, and neither do I."
Secretary: "Are you also aware, that the members sit naked in the steam room?"
Scot: "Aye, I also do the same."
Secretary: "But you are a Jew?"
Scot: "Aye, I be that."
Secretary: "So, being Jewish, you are circumcised, is that correct?"
Scot: "Aye, I be that, too."
Secretary: "I am terribly sorry, but the members just would not feel comfortable sitting in the steam room with you, since your privates are different from theirs."
Scot: "Ach, I know that you have to be a Protestant to march with the Orangemen. And I know that you have to be a Catholic to join the Knights of Columbus. But this is the first time I've heard that you have to be a complete prick to join a golf club!"
About a week later he received a letter that his application has been rejected.
He went to the club to inquire as to why.
Secretary: "You are aware that this is a Scottish golf club?"
Scot: "Aye, but I am as Scottish as you are, ma'am, my name is MacTavish"
.
Secretary: "Do you know that on formal occasions we wear a kilt?"
Scot: "Aye, I do know, and I wear a kilt too."
Secretary: "You are also aware, that we wear nothing under the kilt?"
Scot: "Aye, and neither do I."
Secretary: "Are you also aware, that the members sit naked in the steam room?"
Scot: "Aye, I also do the same."
Secretary: "But you are a Jew?"
Scot: "Aye, I be that."
Secretary: "So, being Jewish, you are circumcised, is that correct?"
Scot: "Aye, I be that, too."
Secretary: "I am terribly sorry, but the members just would not feel comfortable sitting in the steam room with you, since your privates are different from theirs."
Scot: "Ach, I know that you have to be a Protestant to march with the Orangemen. And I know that you have to be a Catholic to join the Knights of Columbus. But this is the first time I've heard that you have to be a complete prick to join a golf club!"
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