Originally posted by ntp
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Don't laugh. I have an Iphone 3 with no apps and only use it for phone and SMS, except today where I took a picture. My missus has asked me to put an app on her phone - she is less tech savvy than me. She doesn't even do internet. The closest she gets is downloading books onto her Kindle from Amazon.Originally posted by spike69 View PostLeave a comment:
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100 series cruiser heading into Mandurah today rego was PHUKET.
I have a picture on my phone but no idea how to send it to my email account so I can put it up here.Leave a comment:
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New Element Discovered:
The CSIRO has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science.
The new element is Governmentium (Gv).
It has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lefton-like particles called peons.
Since Governmentium has no electrons or protons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.
A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction normally taking less than a second to take from four days to four years to complete.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years. It does not decay but instead undergoes a reorganisation in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.
In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganisation will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.
When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons. All of the money is consumed in the exchange, and no other byproducts are produced.Leave a comment:
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LOL. Reminds me of two incidents I've seen.Originally posted by Spilsy View Post
1: Street vendor in Cambodia where the exchange rate is 1 USD to 4000 Riels:
American Tourist: "How much is that"?
Street Vendor: "1 dollar"
American Tourist: "Hell no, I'm not paying that much! I'll give you 5000 Riels!"
Street Vendor: "Ok"
Tourist to his wife smiling: "You've got to bargain hard in these Asian Countries. They respect that."
2: Greyhound check in Boston:
Clerk: "How can I help you today sir"
Me: "Can I have two tickets on the quarter to nine coach to New York
Clerk: "I'm sorry sir we don't have one at that time, we only have one at eight forty-five"
Me: "Oh I see, I guess I'll take the eight forty-five coach thanks"Leave a comment:
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I spotted this excerpt of a conversation between a customer and an airline help desk:
Customer: “How long does it take to fly to Los Angeles?”
Help Desk: “About 12 hours.”
Customer: “OK, and how long does it take in economy?”
Help Desk: “About 12 hours; it’s the same aeroplane.”
Customer: “I’ll need to think it over, I’ll call back another time.”
Help Desk: “Yes, sir, economy and business travel take place in the same dimension.”Leave a comment:
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